Father’s Day is a day that triggers deep hurt and grief for many. When there’s been a death or divorce, desertion or even dementia, Father’s Day hurts. We can grieve the father we had or the father we wish we’d had. What are the best ways to manage Father’s Day grief?
I’ve rounded up the best posts on Father’s Day for the grieving. This curated list has posts for the many ways Father’s Day can hurt. Even if it’s a mixed day where you’re celebrating one father while grieving another, the words of these posts will bring comfort. Whether you’re grieving your own father, helping your children navigate grief for theirs or walking with a spouse or family member through pain, finding ways to intentionally approach Father’s Day will help you manage the grief it can bring.
Father’s Day Grief Pieces I’ve Published Around the Web
5 Ways to Celebrate Father’s Day When It Hurts
passed away and I became a widow and single mom to our seven kids – ranging from preschoolers to teens. How would we approach Father’s Day now?
And while my father was still living, and deserved to be honored, my own children’s father was in heaven. Navigating my children through grief compounded my own.
On that first painful Father’s Day, my oldest came into my room and unwrapped the gift he’d ordered weeks before for his dad – an oiled canvas hat. Size XL. He asked if it would be okay to send it to an uncle and though we sent it off with a heartfelt note, we knew it was too big for him and not his style. It was yet another snapshot of our gaping pain.
How do you manage when your heart hurts on Father’s Day? It can be painful for so many reasons. Your father has died, or left after a divorce or been absent when you longed for him. Maybe his anger or abuse or addiction kept him from being the father you needed. Do you just skip the day altogether or try your best to shut out the noise until Father’s Day has passed? Here are 5 ways we found to approach Father’s Day when it hurts.
How to Care for Fatherless Children on Father’s Day
I don’t know yet what it is to lose a father, but I’ve parented my seven children through the loss of their dad at a very young age. I can’t fix their hurt and I want to recognize my children’s pain and deep loss. Perhaps you or your children are also navigating a hard Father’s Day this year because of death or divorce or a dad who just hasn’t shown up for his family as he should. There’s no quick fix for the pain, but here are 5 ways to help when Father’s Day hurts. Read the rest here.
Why I Still Believe In Father’s Day (Even When It Hurts)
Father’s Day forever changed for us six years ago. Just days before the holiday, my husband suddenly passed away and I became a widow and single mom to our seven kids – ranging from preschoolers to teens.
Two days later, on that first painful Father’s Day, my oldest showed me the gift he’d ordered weeks before for his dad – an oiled canvas hat. Size XL. The fact that it wouldn’t fit anyone else close to us was such a picture of our gaping loss. What do we do with Father’s Day when it hurts? When we’re grieving a dad who’s passed away, or who’s left deep wounds from a divorce or from not being there? Do we just skip the day altogether? Cover our eyes and ears until Father’s Day has passed? Read the rest here.
52 Bible Verses to Grieve With Hope
In deep grief, God’s word brings deep comfort. The Bible is living and active and meets the most broken and pain-filled places in our soul. “Within the Scripture there is balm for every wound, a salve for every sore,” Charles Spurgeon said. Early in my grief, I was desperate for comfort only God could bring. Some Bible verses anchored me when my world turned upside down. Some verses reminded me of God’s truth when lies threatened to pull me under. And some Bible verses brought hope that, despite the cavernous loss and sadness, life would feel good again. These 52 Bible verses to grieve with hope are some of my favorite scriptures to bring comfort when we’re hurting.
12 Bible Verses for the Fatherless and Single Mom
God loves the widow and fatherless. He has always taken care of them. God’s Old Testament laws made special provision for them, protected them and their land, and gave serious warning to anyone who took advantage of them.
And the New Testament does the same. The very role of deacon came about because of the church needed godly men of integrity who would make sure daily provision was made for the widow. Timothy gave detailed instructions to the early church on how to care for widows.
God’s very character is described as the defender of widows and father to the fatherless. Caring for the widow and the fatherless is not just what God does; it’s who he is.
Father’s Day Grief Pieces From Friends Around the Web
In death
How to Celebrate Father’s Day When Your Daddy is Gone by Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young
The following are some ideas compiled with the help of some of my widow friends on how to remember and celebrate Father’s Day when a daddy is gone. I have found it’s important to make plans ahead of time, but to hold them lightly and cover ourselves with grace on the actual day.
Creating a New Remembrance Day After Death
Fatherless Grief: Memorials and Remembrance by Lori Apon
While many across the country honor dads in June on Father’s Day, our family chose a different time for remembering Father’s Day. Psalm 68:5 was quoted just 24 hours before my husband died, and I really believed that God would fulfill His word. The date of your husband’s death is the day that God became Father to your children as well (the Remembrance Day). Because of this truth, God gave our family a creative way to remember this day by leading us to consider our Remembrance Day as our new Father’s Day, replacing the traditional Father’s Day recognized by the world.
You can lead your children by letting them know that Father’s Day in June is to celebrate earthly dads, and while that is great for families who have them here, God has given them their own special day to honor their Heavenly Father! They truly have a new Father’s Day. By relocating that day and renaming it as your new Father’s Day, I found that it helped remove the string from the traditional day of honoring dads. It was a day we looked forward to, even though it was a sad and happy day, we always made it memorable.
In divorce
Love to the Fatherless by Tara Dickson
Father’s Day. It should be such an easy holiday, right? A barbecue, a tie, a homemade card. It wasn’t for me and isn’t for so many and yet now, more than ever, I see the need to celebrate Fatherhood. The work these men are called to is holy. It’s one only they can do. As a child whose father didn’t live with her. I hungered for a father for many reasons…
In infertility
Skipping Service by Diane Newcomer
Father’s Day is one of the two Sundays of the year I want to snuggle in bed all morning and not go to church. My husband and I both grew up in the church and attended weekly. We love church so much that we go on a Christmas Crawl and see how many services we can attend over Christmas (the most ever is 6!) We believe in the local church and attend even when we aren’t excited about going, but Mother’s and Father’s Day are always days we give ourselves a pass.
However, Father’s Day is when the inclusive body of Christ becomes exclusive. Fathers are encouraged to stand up and be applauded. They are given gifts. Video montages of happy children and their fathers are played. The sermon is often “man up and be a good dad,” or “honor your dad”. For me, it was deeply painful to be in the place where our unmet prayers were celebrated for others. Read the rest here.
In adoption
Happy Father’s Day (to A Father I Do Not Know)
I do not know my son’s father. Neither does he. Maybe he heard his voice from deep within the womb.
Would he recognize it, if he heard it now?
In Abandonment
Hope for the Fatherless, with Barb Roose and Kia Stephens
Barb Roose and Kia Stephens talk about “father wounds” — pain that inflicts a daughter’s soul when her father is absent due to abandonment, divorce, incarceration, addiction or even if he is present, but emotionally detached or unavailable. This loss is felt deeply, no matter a daughter’s age. So, acknowledging and addressing this painful ache is vital for a woman’s emotional, spiritually and relational well-being. Watch as Kia shares the three essential principles that women of all ages need to understand if they want God to heal the emotional and spiritual damage.
A Father’s Day Prayer
A Prayer for the Fatherless on Father’s Day by Lori Apon
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