It was by all accounts idyllic.
A beautiful day for the beach, really. The sky was bright blue after a week of heavy clouds and drenching afternoon downpours. Low tide had provided a wide expanse of sand with warm tidepools that edged the sandbars just before the shore breaks.
My two high school boys, backs turned to the sun on their towels, had fallen asleep after an early deep-sea fishing trip and I sat in the shade of a large umbrella, alternating between keeping tabs on my younger two in the water and the book I’d downloaded to my phone.
Glancing up, I watched my youngest son carry a surf board up from the water. His dad’s surfboard. How many days had I watched his dad walking up this same beach, carrying that same board after a long surf session?
I lingered over this long-legged boy coming up the beach. He’ll be 13 next month. A coming of age without his dad.
Familiar regret colored my thoughts. His dad should have been here. He should have been here to teach him how to surf, to give pointers on throwing the perfect cast net, to help him get from boy to man.
This is not the good life I wanted for you, my heart grieved.
I’d love you to join me to read the rest of this post, Surrendering My Child’s Entitled Life, at ChristyMobley.com.
If you’re new here at True and Faithful, you can get encouragement delivered to your inbox. Subscribe here and I’d love to send you my free 100 Days with Christ Bible Study and Journal.
Melissa Patterson says
Just what I needed today! Thank you Lisa for writing about the hard stuff.
Lisa Appelo says
❤ Thank you, Melissa.
Theresa says
Lisa, thank you for these timely words! Thanks for speaking truth into my life.
Lisa Appelo says
❤❤ For me as well, Theresa! I needed to process what was lurking in my heart.
Janice Cruce says
As always, what you have written touches my heart. Thank you, Lisa.
Going back to your SUMMER READING LIST blog…I just finished GOD IS RED by Liao Yiwu, and though it was painful to read, I am very glad I did. The fact that Yiwu is not a believer is so hard for me to understand especially after he has met with and interviewed the many followers of Jesus who have suffered because of their faith. Still…the day may yet come when he, too, follows Christ.
I read the Nanny book, too, and enjoyed it. Have a couple more downloaded and will get to them yet. Thanks for your recommendations.
Lisa Appelo says
Oh good to hear! I’m reading the many book,a light read before I hit a couple harder ones!
Aunt Mary Anne says
Dan was such a great father, an inspiration to all the other fathers in our family and I am sure friends of yours both. One thing you can be proud of is that he set an example for your older boys. I am sure they are teaching The younger children thru his example and yours. It’s good training for when they have children of their own. Love you lady.
Lisa Appelo says
Dan relished being a dad. I think the older ones have modeled so much of what Dan would have taught and there is nothing better than seeing Seth or one of the olders take Matt fishing. Love you, Aunt Mary Ann.
Gayl says
Lisa, what a beautiful post showing us what surrender can do. We think we know what is best sometimes and we think we have good plans, but God has a way of changing things. We learn to trust that He knows best even when our hearts are grieving. May God continue to be with you and strengthen and comfort through the hard times.
Blessings! I’m your neighbor at #FaithonFire.
Lisa Appelo says
Gayl, yes, it’s all about trust. Right where God wants us.
Sherri Thompson says
Some people do more, say more, contribute more, and impact others more in a short amount of time than most do in a lifetime. That was Dan. A legacy that will live on in your family for generations! Love…
Lynda-Sue Ledingham says
Hello Lisa, Thank you for sharing this. My husband went off to Heaven on July 18th, 1994. I totally understand your post as my children were 17, 15 and 3. Our Beautiful Daughter and 2 Handsome sons. Our Father is always Good and Faithful. I continue to pray for The Lord’s perfect will and plan unfold for their live and my now 8 grandchildren. Many opportunities for overcoming and pressing in and onward over the years:).
Love ya, Lynda-Sue
Somer says
This was a great article
I needed to read this.
Haven’t thought of this in exactly this way before.
God bless
Theresa Boedeker says
Love your point about how we place our order about how we want life to look and be, and then try to make it come to fruition. No God never gives stones and we have much more than we can even imagine. Thanks for this reminder.
Eve says
Those regrets about what we didn’t or couldn’t give our children hit home especially when you have lost a child. We lost our 27 year old son, and nearly every day, even as a Christian, I find myself grieving over the “what ifs”. Your description of the idllyic “order” you put in for your life is so familiar.
Thank you for the article and God bless you.
Megan Elzey says
Sometimes we go through things in our lives that make no earthly sense. I’m praying God continues to carry you as you walk through this.
Lisa Appelo says
So true, Megan. Yet our Heavenly Father allows them and He can only be loving. So we trust. Thank you for your prayers!
Julie says
Excellent thoughts,as always, Lisa. Thanks for listening to Him carefully and then sharing with us.