Years ago, a girl gave her heart to a boy.
He’d first been a best friend. There’d been laughter and stories swapped on long youth trips, open school bus windows blowing in hot air and legs sticking against vinyl seats.
There’d been summer Sunday fellowships after church with games and swimming and school year lunches when the whole gang squeezed into the birthday booth at Burger King.
When the oldest in their circle got a license and family car, there were weekly day trips to find waves and she’d gone for the sun.
Somewhere in the laughter and bus rides and waves, she’d gotten to really know him and she fell hard.
Months were filled with double dates, flowers at the front door, letters and pictures and ticket stubs that slowly filled a shoebox in her closet.
One day, he wasn’t returning her smiles. He walked her to class but left without conversation. Nothing’s wrong, he said. But there was distance. And when she pressed, he said he’d been watching her give the smiles that used to be his to another. He’d noted the “harmless” time she spent with another.
It had been an imperceptible shift to her.
He wanted the first love.
Love only for him.
Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. (Revelation 2:4)
It’s almost undetectable, each day’s small move toward or away.
It comes from giving my attention to another.
From giving priority to another.
From “harmless” time with another.
It comes from falling in love with the gifts when it was the Giver who wooed us.
It comes from serving where He’s called but losing wonder of the Master.
God’s name is Jealous. (Exodus 34:14)
He will have nothing less than our single-minded heart.
After Dan died, emptied of so much that had been life and crushed for what life was now, I fell in love all over again.
The emptying and crushing times help us see that we need God so desperately. We can feel Him intensely in those times. We talk to him constantly and hear Him clearly.
We beg His wisdom for all the scary new and cling to His hope for the unknown ahead.
He is the deepest love at our weakest and darkest.
Oh, how I begged God to never take me from that place of deep love when my heart didn’t hurt so much and life looked brighter.
First love can flourish in the sunny days as much as the hard days.
How to keep first love flourishing?
1. First love thrives with reckless trust.
Am I trusting God to step out to places where I need Him desperately? To places where He is my hope?
2. First love flourishes when God’s voice is first.
Do I crave time in the Word with God? Do I fit the Word into the leftovers of life or fit life around the Word? Is God speaking to me more loudly anything else?
3. First love deepens when God is all.
Do I want what God wants? Is God enough or do I expect more? Is God my peace and satisfaction or am I looking for that somewhere else?
Today we will either move toward God or away but none of us will stay where we are.
“For I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God himself. I promised you as a pure bride to one husband—Christ.” (2 Corinthians 11:2 NLT)
Today Lord, bring us back to our first Love. Our heart is Yours alone.
You are our only all.
Julie F says
Perfect timing for what I’m going through. I keep hearing His voice telling me to get rid of anything that comes between us and that’s a lot of stuff! I’m just recovering from the nasty flu bug and I look around my house and all I can say is “get rid of it”. I don’t need it.
Lisa Appelo says
Yes, that’s what I’m sensing as well….to ruthlessly get rid of distraction. Praying it for you and me both!
K Ann Guinn says
Thank-you for sharing. I needed this today. It’s so easy for me to get caught up in the overwhelm of daily life responsibilities, and flounder in my own strength.
I am reminded to make Him my all once again and keep him front and center as I go about each day.
Lisa Appelo says
The pulls of life are real. What an example Jesus is of loving God fully even in the busy and pulls of life.
Paris Renae says
Powerful reminder and sweet reminder – He is our all, jealously and zealously love us, proving His faithfulness at all times in all ways.
Lisa Appelo says
May it be so. I find I have to fight the distractions that pull my attention and time away.
Betsy de Cruz says
What a good word this is for me today, Lisa. I am loved. So are you, my friend. Let’s trust Him recklessly. I read these three points at the end through twice. <3 Want to stay by my first love.
Lisa Appelo says
Me too, Besty. Not caught up in checking off the list but caught up in the wonder and love of Christ.
Holly Farney says
Thank-you for this timely post. It really has spoken to me. I enjoy and am blessed by your blog! God bless you!
Lisa Appelo says
Thank you Holly! Glad you’re here and that God loves us enough to demand our all.
Ruth says
Thanks for the reminder!