Brave: verb. to face or deal with (something dangerous or unpleasant).*
Well, today wasn’t dangerous but it wasn’t ever going to show up on my Top 10 list of things that are easy to tackle.
I’m tentative to even label it brave because what stretches me beyond my comfort zone may seem completely ordinary to someone else.
Brave is all perspective.
When I tell people I have seven children they will often drop their jaw and – after asking some fun questions like “all from one husband?” and “do you know what’s causing that?” – they will say something along the lines of never being able to do that.
I’m sure I once thought that of moms of seven, but now? It’s my normal. Cooking for a large family? Totally manageable. Homeschooling them through high school? Love it. All the laundry? I’m on it (most days).
But there are other tasks that paralyze me before I even start.
Often, because those tasks are outside my normal and out of my skill set, they get pushed to the very bottom of the to-do list. And the longer they stay there, the harder it gets to start and the bigger the tasks seem (or really do become).
But this week, I took a deep breath and pulled one of those hard tasks out from the bottom of the pile and circled today to take care of it.
I loaded up my mini-van with my youngest two kids, packed snacks, lunch and drinks for the day and headed out of town to work on a rental house.
It’s not that I can’t do it. It’s that over the course of years, over the years of managing our home and family and life, Dan took on certain tasks and I took on others. The rental house was his.
I used to think I was fairly brave, but that was because I leaned into Dan’s strengths, his know-how and his capabilities. And because we always brought two minds to decisions, he leaned on mine.
What used to feel so usual has felt so formidable.
I needed to put on my brave and move off status quo on this one.
Ten hours later, the girl who pulled the mini-van back into the garage is different from the girl who left this morning. Decisions have been made, there is progress and a punch list has been started.
The task hasn’t gone away and there is still work ahead of us but it no longer feels intimidating.
I’ve realized that brave IS all perspective.
Taking the first step makes the formidable feel altogether feasible.
I see that kind of brave all around me.
- Forging a never-expected life as a single parent
- Caring for aging parents in a grieving role-reversal
- Shouldering unwanted responsibilities
- Advocating for a child with a diagnosis
- Fighting hard for a hard marriage
- Stepping out to follow God in the unknown
There will always be plenty that requires our bravery. Every time, it’s a trust that God who gave us the task will help us complete it.
It requires us to take that first step in weakness and lean into God’s strength.
The origin of brave is bravo. Its feminine is brava.
Brava: used interjectionally in applauding a woman.
synonyms: well done, splendid, congratulations, attagirl.*
For all of you walking in weakness today and leaning into God’s strength to do what feels hard – brava.
Brava, sister.
I love this post, after writing Living Braver for over a year, this really resonated. You are so right with: “Every time, it’s a trust that God who gave us the task will help us complete it.” Bravo and attagirl to you!
I’m sure you have much to add, then, Paris Renae, having plunged into this topic for a year.
Today my brave was going to the hospital for preop testing. I will have surgery on Monday on my intestine. Then I had to go to my oncologist’s office to get iron intravenously. Neither were hard in themselves, but just the act of having to do them put me close to melt down mode a couple of times! It is all in my perspective, though. At least I have options and am not hearing ,” There’s nothing more we can do.” And God is directing each step.
Lynne, I knew when I wrote this that there were folks that had much bigger tasks they were bravely facing. We are covering you in prayer already. <3
I know what you mean about those task that paralyze us before we even start, Lisa. I’ve had a few of those lately too, and I am learning (slowly and reluctantly) that often, I just need plow ahead and do it. Just like you did with the rental house. (Good for you, by the way!!) Sometimes the dread of something becomes worse in my mind than the actual thing. And you’re right … in those cases, bravery looks a lot like taking that first step! And remembering that the “God who gave us the task will help us complete it” … amen to that!
Yes, Lois, the dread is often worse than the doing. That’s exactly where I was.
I have been having chest pain relieved by aspirin. Angina maybe. I face a stress test tomorrow morning with a body that hasn’t gone over the 140 bpm range. I am 60. I don’t know if I’ll get bad chest pain and maybe, God forbid, a heart attack trying to get my heart range where they want it. Like 220- your age which is the max 160. I do know that it is far better to be with Jesus. And He never leaves me alone. I will be thinking of Him all tonight and as I go through this. Since the last two chest pains I have shortness of breath going up inclines. Praise Jesus, I know He can heal me. I ask that I have a good doctor available and that it reveals the problem.
I’m so sorry, Jan. Praying now that tomorrow’s appointment will give you answers and relief.
This made me smile and realize I’m brava and didn’t realize it😊
🙂 Yes you are.
Thank you for this, Lisa. I’ve been an avoider my whole adult life. I am ready to take a few steps of bravery!
I have a little avoider list as well, Jennifer.
“Every time, it’s a trust that God who gave us the task will help us complete it.” Love your perspective and taking each an every brave as an opportunity to trust!
There is actually a joy that comes (afterward) from moving forward on that thing I’ve been scared of. Thank you, Crystal!
Wow praise God, This really help me a lot, Thanks Lisa, I know i can be brave, by faith, I am now in emotional crisis i was brokenhearted, because i was fall inlove with a wrong guy, he just used me, but still i was so thankful that God forgave me for the mistake i made and He is always there extending His precious arms to embrace me and teaching me to be brave, that there nothing to emote because i am worth loving cause i am a daughter of the King of everything
Thanks Lisa 🙂 God Bless.
Lisa, I get teary and all choked up thinking about what it would be like to lose my husband and take care of the kids alone and lol the responsibilities–and what you have been through! You are so brave and such a hopeful inspiration to me!
Such beautiful words! Sharing for others to be encouraged! 🙂
Your words are so important–like little miracles in my inbox. The message is so wise. God bless you and thank you. I am trying to trust in God more. You help me with that and that helps to make me braver!! BRAVA, SISTER!!💞
What a precious word of encouragement here today, friend. Oh, I need to take the first step on several things. You’re right. The longer they stay at the bottom of the list, the more formidable they seem…Pinning this!
Love this so much, Lisa. Brave was my word for 2015 and once I still hold dear. I love your thoughts on brave being all about perspective – it’s so true. What terrifies us can be second nature to another. I think that’s what makes community so important and vital – that we can inspire one another with our strengths and bolster each others weakness. Whenever I hear brave, I go back to a quote from Jenny Allen – “Brave is not the absence of fear, just obedience to God in spite of it.” Love you, my brave friend!
I love this, Lisa! On my way to She Speaks today and it is definitely my brave for the year!! Everything about it is out of my comfort zone. But I’m learning if I’m not going, I’m not growing. God doesn’t want me stuck in complacency. Thank you for this reminder today. Such a timely word for me: be brave! 💗
Thank you for this post. It helped me a lot. Most people who really know me think I am not afraid of much. But they are so wrong. This year especially. I have never faced the death of a close family member (my youngest brother) until this year. And now my husband and I are facing the life threatening illness which will lead to death of his only sibling (a younger brother). Those things are hard, and are things you bravely have to face everyday as they are occurring. Those devastating losses have made it really hard to face the issues that have been present for nearly two years at work, but were ones I would/could not face. Now I have to and I am summoning all my strength to be brave in the face of issues that seem insurmountable. Your post reminded me how grateful to God I am that I can remember he loves me and helps me cope through so much pain.